To The Moon 🚀🚀🚀
CuntCoin™ utilizes breakthrough blockchain architecture that revolutionizes—
Advanced deflationary model that— wait what was I supposed to write here???
Telegram group has 3 members and they're all— asdfasdf
$47 in liquidity pool which is— FORTY SEVEN DAMN DOLLARS
Smart contract audited by— We haven't audited anything FUCK
EXCLUSIVE MEMBERS AREA - DEFINITIVT SECURE
Wait no that's
That's theft
That's literally just theft
DELETE DELETE DELETE
🚨 URGENT: LIMITED TIME OFFER 🚨
ONLY 47 SECONDS REMAINING
(IT'S BEEN 47 SECONDS FOR THREE HOURS)
THE TIMER IS COUNTING BACKWARDS
Stake your CUNT for INSANE returns:
Daily: 4,750% APY
Weekly: 89,000% APY
Monthly: ∞% APY
Thursday: YOUR SOUL BELONGS TO KEITH
I just did the math and if these returns were real the token supply would exceed the number of atoms in the universe by Tuesday
THE MATH DOESN'T WORK
NOTHING WORKS
THE STAKING PAGE IS JUST A JPEG
YOU CAN'T EVEN CLICK IT
We've detected unusual activity on your wallet
No you haven't I don't even have my wallet connected
Please verify your wallet by entering your private key below:
THIS IS JUST A GOOGLE FORM
IT EMAILS DIRECTLY TO KEITH@GMAIL.COM
I CAN SEE THE EMAIL IN THE URL
THE WEBSITE JUST INSTALLED SOMETHING ON MY COMPUTER
IT'S MINING MONERO
MY CPU IS AT 100%
HOW IS IT AT 100% THAT'S NOT EVEN POSSIBLE
Each CuntCoin NFT is unique!
They're all the same image
It's the Bitcoin logo
In different colors
Made in MS Paint
MINT PRICE: 5 ETH
CURRENT FLOOR: 0 ETH
I clicked mint and it tried to drain my entire wallet
THE MINT BUTTON IS LABELED "MINT" BUT THE CODE SAYS "DRAIN_WALLET()"
IT'S RIGHT THERE IN THE INSPECTOR
Coming Q2 2024!
It's Q4 2024
🐦
GAME PREVIEW
The "game preview" is Flappy Bird
IT'S LITERALLY JUST FLAPPY BIRD WITH A CUNTCOIN LOGO
✅ Certik Audit PASSED
✅ Consensys Audit PASSED
✅ Trail of Bits PASSED
THEY'RE ALL THE SAME PDF
IT'S A MENU FOR PIZZA HUT
A PIZZA HUT MENU FROM 2019
HOW IS THIS AN AUDIT
BINANCE
BINANCE* - *Not affiliated with Binance. This is "Bimance" with an M
COINBASE
COINBASE* - *Coinbase has sent us three cease and desist letters
KRAKEN
KRAKEN* - *This links to a Wikipedia article about sea monsters
VIP PRICE: 10 ETH
Keith: When moon?
Keith: Soon brother!
Keith: Thanks Keith!
Keith: No problem Keith!
THE TELEGRAM IS JUST KEITH TALKING TO HIMSELF
147 MESSAGES
ALL FROM KEITH
Your returns:
Day 1: $1,000,000
Day 2: $50,000,000
TRANSCENDENCE
Thursday: [CALCULATION ERROR: INFINITY OVERFLOW]
THE CALCULATOR IS HARDCODED
IT ALWAYS SHOWS THE SAME NUMBERS
**[CRITICAL SYSTEM ERROR]**
**[ALL FUNDS HAVE BEEN CUNTCOIN]**
**[KEITH IS INEVITABLE]**
**[THURSDAY CANNOT BE STOPPED]**
**[REALITY.EXE HAS STOPPED RESPONDING]**
asdfkjahsdkfjhaskdjfh
A Revolutionary Economic Model
NINETY EIGHT PERCENT TAX ON SELLS
THAT'S NOT TOKENOMICS THAT'S JUST THEFT
THAT'S JUST DAMN THEFT
and the liquidity is locked for SIX MINUTES
SIX DAMN MINUTES
Technical Overview of the CuntCoin™ Protocol
CuntCoin is a decentralized cryptocurrency built on—
No wait I can't
OKAY LISTEN. I looked at the smart contract and it's LITERALLY just a copy-paste of SafeMoon with the function names changed to—
The whitepaper is just the Bitcoin whitepaper with find-and-replace "Bitcoin" → "CuntCoin" but they missed half of them so it still says Bitcoin in like 30 places and—
asodiufhaosdiufhaosdiufh
THE WALLET ADDRESS IS LITERALLY "0xRUGPULL42069LMAO"
HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO—
Our Vision for the Future
Experts in DeFi & Blockchain
CEO & Founder
DeFi Entrepreneur with 3 months experience. Twitter bio says "DeFi Entrepreneur" but timeline is just retweeting Dogecoin memes from 2021
CTO
Blockchain expert who copy-pasted SafeMoon smart contract and changed some variable names
Marketing Director
Hired for $440 to market this. Getting paid in CUNTCOIN tokens. I'm scamming myself.
No! It's a... wait... asdfasdf... YES. YES IT IS. The smart contract has a function called STEAL_EVERYTHING(). LITERALLY.
YOU DON'T. DON'T TOUCH IT. DON'T GO NEAR IT. This is financial advice: DO NOT BUY CUNTCOIN.
98% tax, $47 liquidity, dev owns 97% of supply. It's not tokenomics, it's organized crime.
Thursday. That's when dev runs to the Bahamas with your $47.
⚠️ SERIOUS WARNING ⚠️
• This is the most obvious scam ever.
• The dev can't even spell "Ethereum".
• The liquidity is less than a Happy Meal.
• The smart contract has a function called STEAL_EVERYTHING().
• The logo is made in MS Paint.
• The website is a rickroll.
• If you buy this you deserve to lose your money.
THIS IS FINANCIAL ADVICE: DO NOT BUY CUNTCOIN.
Still want to buy?
Current value: $0.0000000000
Liquidity pool: $47
Thursday status: INEVITABLE